Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
It's shark week go big or go home
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
