he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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