They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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