I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Randomize
