ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
