I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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