It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
PANTIES FOUND
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize