Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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