Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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