He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
