Duck Duck Cougar?
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
