is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
