So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
2020 sucks, I want a refund
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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