Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Soap is not a condiment
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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