I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
