it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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