I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Randomize
