Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
