They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
do herpes really smell.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
