I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
