You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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