I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
