I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
