he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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