my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
