Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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