my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
