So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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