Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Me too!
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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