i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
