Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
