The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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