So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
