as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
