That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Randomize
