also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
