well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
