I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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