so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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