Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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