Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
