we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
