So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
