quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
