Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
