let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
