I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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