I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
honey bunches of taint.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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