The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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