nut hugger
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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